Loss Sucks

loss
Photo Credit: Corrie… via Compfight cc

My Loss

I had a couple running mates taken from me in my teens. The street got ’em.

I had my sister taken from me at 24. Cancer got her.

I had my first child taken from me at 26 (miscarriage).  Not sure why.

I had my first dog taken from me at 35. Other priorities got her.

I guess by the language above, I blame someone or something.  The streets, the doctors, little dogs. Because I place blame, I’m angry. I don’t do so well with the emotions, instead preferring to surround myself with cognition. But no matter whether it’s thinking or feeling, loss sucks.

I realized today that I’ve never dealt with any of this. Any of the losses. I cried a bit at each one, then tucked it away, stood up, and got on.

I realized today that because I’ve never dealt with any of these losses, those close to me have been robbed of the full me. Not that I’m all that and a bag of chips or anything, but I do think I’m pretty cool with a lot to offer. My loss has translated into their loss, because I’ve been selfish and not wanted to get messy.

Loss sucks. But it’s up to us to not let it perpetuate. It’s up to me to end the cycle.

Your Loss

What have you lost?

Have you dealt with it, so others have the full you?

 

6 thoughts on “Loss Sucks

  1. Great, great blog….I’ve had losses and sometimes I too feel I stuffed them down. But then the Lord reminds me He is in charge and I should rest in that. Thanks brother for being real and transparent.

    1. Susan – being real and transparent is very tough, unfortunately, but is so rewarding and also can be so helpful for others. Life’s too short to hide and to play games

  2. I distanced myself from a friend because he had closed himself off so much that he didn’t even realize that he said and did some pretty hurtful things. Or maybe he did and didn’t care. But it made me realize that I was more invested in the friendship than he was and the realization made me quite sad.

    1. Yes, those of us who close up hurt not only ourselves but those around us. We hit our loss limit and hopefully wake up and stop being an ass. Sad either way.

  3. I lost my brother at the age of 6 due to a accidental gun shot before I was born and then the lost of my dad when I was 12. Even though, ‘having losses’ is the circle of life I believe it manifests into other things as well. For some odd reason it changes our character not only for ourselves but anyone whose effected by the loss. I’m a firm believer that things happen for a purpose no matter if it goes our way or not.

Start a Ruckus - Share Your Thoughts