I had a couple running mates taken from me in my teens. The street got ’em.
I had my sister taken from me at 24. Cancer got her.
I had my first child taken from me at 26 (miscarriage). Not sure why.
I had my first dog taken from me at 35. Other priorities got her.
I guess by the language above, I blame someone or something. The streets, the doctors, little dogs. Because I place blame, I’m angry. I don’t do so well with the emotions, instead preferring to surround myself with cognition. But no matter whether it’s thinking or feeling, loss sucks.
I realized today that I’ve never dealt with any of this. Any of the losses. I cried a bit at each one, then tucked it away, stood up, and got on.
I realized today that because I’ve never dealt with any of these losses, those close to me have been robbed of the full me. Not that I’m all that and a bag of chips or anything, but I do think I’m pretty cool with a lot to offer. My loss has translated into their loss, because I’ve been selfish and not wanted to get messy.
Loss sucks. But it’s up to us to not let it perpetuate. It’s up to me to end the cycle.
What have you lost?
Have you dealt with it, so others have the full you?